Perfect
by EmoStarlette
Summary: The fight that caused Ditey to run off to Everwood. Short blurby songfic, that goes along with the Southern Rose series.


Title: Perfect Author: WickedWillow1 aka Isabela aka Stephanie Series: The Southern Rose Series (yes it is a series now!) Rating: PG for a couple swears (I think). Disclaimer: I do not own Everwood. I do not own the song in this fic. I do however own the characters in this fic. Please ask me if for some reason you want to use them. PLEASE R and R!   
  
"Ditey Nicole Lawson! What in the hell were you thinking?" May Lawson yelled at her youngest daughter, as she dragged her into their apartment. "Let go of me!" Ditey hollered back, shrugging her mother off. She stormed into the kitchen and grabbed a can of coke out of the fridge, "It's my body and I'll do what I want with it." May glanced at the stud protruding from her daughter's nose.   
  
~*Hey mom look at me  
  
Think back and talk to me  
  
did I grow up according to plan?  
  
And do you think I'm wasting my time doing things I wanna do?  
  
But it hurts when you disapprove all along*~  
  
Ditey avoided making eye contact with her mother. So what? If her mother could parade around in revealing outfits in front of 100's of people a night, why couldn't she get a simple stud on her nose? This was totally unfair. She had no idea what it was like to be 13. "I don't know why you can't just stay out of my life!" Ditey screamed.   
  
~*And now I try hard to make it  
  
I just want to make you proud  
  
I'm never gonna be good enough for you  
  
I can't pretend that  
  
I'm alright  
  
and you can't change me*~  
  
  
  
May couldn't help but long for the little girl in honey blonde pigtails, dancing around on the kitchen floor. When had this happened? When had she lost her little girl, her baby? The girl standing in front of her, with her dyed, purple streaked, chestnut hair, and a newfound adult attitude, resembled something completely different. It reminded her of herself at that age. But Ditey couldn't end up like her. Fifteen and pregnant, with no clue about life. "Why can't you just think before you do things?" May asked, still furious.   
  
~*'Cuz we lost it all  
  
Nothing lasts forever  
  
I'm sorry  
  
I can't be perfect  
  
Now it's just too late and  
  
We can't go back  
  
I'm sorry  
  
I can't be perfect*~  
  
"I'm sorry I can't be perfect," Ditey shot back, "I'm sorry I can't be like your perfect apartment, or your perfect car, or fit into your perfect little life! Why can't you understand? I'm not some possession!"   
  
~*I try not to think  
  
About the pain I feel inside  
  
Did you know you used to be my hero?  
  
All the days you spend with me  
  
Now seem so far away  
  
And it feels like you don't care anymore *~  
  
"You don't get it do you?" May replied, "I'm trying to keep you from ruining your life!" "Ruining my life?!?" Ditey shouted, "Did you ever consider that maybe the only thing ruining my life, is you?"   
  
~*And now I try hard to make it  
  
I just want to make you proud  
  
I'm never gonna be good enough for you  
  
I can't stand another fight  
  
And nothing's alright*~  
  
Ditey stormed off to her room, and slammed her door. Lightning flashed outside, and the clouds gave way to a rare desert storm. Just as rain drops flooded down from the dark night sky, Ditey felt her own salty tears running down her face. She could never do anything right. Nothing was ever good enough.   
  
~*'Cuz we lost it all  
  
Nothing lasts forever  
  
I'm sorry  
  
I can't be perfect  
  
Now it's just too late and  
  
We can't go back  
  
I'm sorry  
  
I can't be perfect*~  
  
Ditey collapsed on her bed, curling up into the fetal position. The fights between her and her mother had gotten increasingly worse since her sister, Josephine. As if on cue, she felt her cell phone vibrate softly in her pants pocket. "Hello?" Ditey asked, answering the phone. "Hey D," It was the familiar voice of her 15 year old sister, Joe. "Hi," Ditey replied, trying to mask the fact that she was crying. "What's going on? Are you okay?" Joe asked, detecting the uneasiness in her sister's voice. "Mom and I got in a fight," Ditey admitted, "I got my nose pierced." "Whoa. So it was a blowout, huh?" Joe said softly. "Yeah. I don't think I can stand it anymore, Josie. I need to get out of here, I can't stand fighting with her anymore," Ditey confided in her sister, who also usually served as her best friend too. "You'll be okay. You know you guys always make up," Joe reassured her, "Remember how mad she was when she caught me drinking with those guys at the Palms? She got over that, so I'm sure she'll get over this." "Yeah, but your good at sweet talking your way out of things. Plus she likes you better, she always has," Ditey explained.   
  
~*Nothing's gonna change the things that you said  
  
Nothing's gonna make this right again  
  
Please don't turn your back  
  
I can't believe it's hard  
  
Just to talk to you  
  
But you don't understand*~   
  
"You know that's not true! We used to fight all the time! Probably even more than you guys do. I mean come on, you couldn't possibly be getting into more trouble then I was at your age," Joe replied, cautiously. "I guess," Ditey sighed, she was completely exhausted, "I'm really tired, can you call me tomorrow?" "Sure thing. Sweet dreams," Joe said hopefully, "I love you." And with that Joe hung up.  
  
  
  
~*'Cuz we lost it all  
  
Nothing lasts forever  
  
I'm sorry  
  
I can't be perfect  
  
Now it's just too late and  
  
We can't go back  
  
I'm sorry  
  
I can't be perfect*~  
  
Lying silently in her bed, Ditey thought of a solution for her problem. The only thing she could think of was for her to leave. She couldn't survive another minute there. The next morning was oddly sunny. The calm after the storm. Groggily, Ditey slumped into the kitchen, still half asleep. May was already sitting at the kitchen table, eating breakfast. "Morning," May greeted, "I see you took that horrible thing out of your nose." Ditey bit her tongue. She wanted so badly to say something back, to defend herself, but instead she decided to tell her mother of her plans. "Mom," Ditey began, "I want to leave here. I want to go live with Joe, and Aunt Nina, and Sam in Colorado." May gave her a bewildered look. Not sure whether to let her go, or make her stay. "So Is that your tactic now? Running away?" May replied coldly, "Your just like your father. I'm not surprised at all." "We both know it's not doing me any good here," Ditey didn't back down, "For once, you have to let me go. Let me make my own choice." May mulled the idea over in her head. It was worth a try. Everwood had seemed to straiten Joe out; maybe it would work for Ditey. She couldn't help but feel she had failed. Not just her daughters, but herself. "You know that I love you right?" May asked her baby. Ditey nodded, looking her mother in the eye for the first time in nearly 3 weeks. "I guess I wish it didn't have to be this way," Ditey replied, "But we've lost it all. Nothing lasts forever. Now it's just to late, and we can't go back." In her mind, Ditey only knew one thing that she really wanted to say. I'm sorry I can't be perfect.  
  
~*'Cuz we lost it all  
  
Nothing lasts forever  
  
I'm sorry  
  
I can't be perfect  
  
Now it's just too late and  
  
We can't go back  
  
I'm sorry  
  
I can't be perfect*~   
  
A/N: The song in this fic "Perfect" is by Simple Plan (some more wonderful Canadians!) and I guess I just want to thank Ditey, for being a character in the Southern Rose series, without you, there obviously wouldn't be a Ditey. Please review (who knows I might add chapter going backward in time) and check out the new sequel fic to Southern Rose, "Fumbling Towards Ecstasy". Thanks so much! 


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